"My Luv Is Like A Leaking Hose"
By Laurie Hamblen
My Luve's like a leaking hose
That lets a garden die.
O, my Luve's like a weed, a weed
That's choking a spring bud's vine.
O, my Luve's like the grub
That's grinding on the rind.
As a hoe cutting a stalk thou art, my lass
So deep in luve am I;
And I will love thee still, my dear.
Till a' last leaf fallen dry.
Till a' last leaf fallen dry, my dear,
And the soil parched wi' sun, my dear.
And I will Love thee still my Dear,
While the sands o' life dry run.
This is a parody poem based on the original "A Red, Red Rose" by Robert Burns and inspired by a past relationship.
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"Pick One"
By Jim Jarvis
Math . . . English
English . . . Math
Math . . . English
English . . . Math
In college I had to pick one over the other
Math was the one that was my druther
Yet iambic pentameter still rattles in my brain
And bouncing around in my cranium it causes pleasure not pain
Ask me to write a sonnet -
I'll get right on it
Ask me to write free verse -
I'll try not to be terse
Ask me to write an ode -
You won't have to goad
Ask me to write a haiku -
Gesundheit to you
Ask me to write a quatrain -
I'll try not to strain
Ask me to write a limerick -
Keeping it appropriate is the trick
Ask me to write a couplet -
(I'll find a good rhyme for couplet as soon as I've found a
good rhyme for orange)
Well, in my next incarnation, to enjoy the ride
Perhaps I'll select English and let the mathematics slide
Math and English may seem like an unlikely combination, but many people will tell you learning math is like learning a foreign language.
